William, Bloody William
by RedDwarfette
Summary: Buffy gets a taste of Bloody William’s famous poetry the night after 'Smashed'. B/S. Perhaps more later.
1. William The Bloody

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Title: William, Bloody William

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Author: RedDwarfette

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Email: SpikeyVampPunk@yahoo.com.au

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Rating: R - This is for the people who were blissfully clueless as to what was happening during 'Smashed' and chose to remain that way.

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Summary: Buffy gets a taste of Bloody William's famous poetry the night after 'Smashed'. If this sucks, at least I know there's enough Vampire in it :)

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Disclaimer: The characters within this Fan Fiction are completely the property of Joss Whedon and UPN. But I do claim the seriously bad poetry!

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William, Bloody William – RedDwarfette

9th/3/2002

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Still shaking from last night revelations, Buffy ran into her room and slammed the door shut. Whoa, this is big. Really big. God, he had been... No, don't go there. She moved away from the door towards her bed and flopped down on the cover. This had all the hallmarks of a defining moment - teenage angst, rebellion against her place in life, sex with a Vampire older than her great-great grandfather. Argh. Buffy turned over, glancing towards her bedside table where a small piece of paper rested against her lamp. Frowning she picked it up and read.

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Ode to Buffy - 

B is for the Booty I'll never forget,

U is for the Ugly demons that you stake, pet,

F is for the Fornicating we did last night,

F is for the French kisses we share when we fight and,

Y is for the Yes you sigh when I shag you silly,

So, what do you say Slayer, are you hot for some Billy?

Love Spike

Buffy was torn between the conflicting emotions of laughing her arse off or beating the crap out of a certain undead poet. Well, I've finally met the man behind the myth. Yes, she thought with a giggle lying back against the bed. William, Bloody William was definitely back.


	2. Buffy The Bloody

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Title: William, Bloody William

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Author: RedDwarfette

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Email: SpikeyVampPunk@yahoo.com.au

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Rating: R - This is for the people who were blissfully clueless as to what was happening during 'Smashed' and chose to remain that way.

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Summary: If Spike thinks he's the worst poet that ever lived he's in for a rude awakening. Set after 'Smashed'. If this sucks, at least I know there's enough Vampire in it :)

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Disclaimer: The characters within this Fan Fiction are completely the property of Joss Whedon and UPN. But I do claim the seriously bad poetry!

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William, Bloody William - RedDwarfette

Chapter 2 – Buffy The Bloody

10th/3/2002

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Spike strode into his crypt after a long night helping the slayer kill his own kind. Pity we couldn't have been doing something more... constructive with our time, he thought. A little wham bam thank you Spike would have been good. Sighing he moved towards his bed knowing that the chances of that were the same as The Backstreet Boys opening for a Metallica concert. At least Buffy hadn't completely cut him off after their 'episode of insanity' as she put it. Nope, just no touching, no speaking about it and no looking at him. He landed on his bed with a thump and strove to get comfortable. He noticed a piece of paper on the pillow and picking it up, read.

Ode To Spike - __

S is for your Smirk devil may care,

P is for the Peroxide you put in your hair, __

I is for the Initiative who gave you a chip,

K is for the killing you've done when you slip,

E is for England from where you hail,

So, Mr Big Bad, was I good to nail?

Love Buffy 

Spike sat there stunned, reading the poem over and over again. So, he thought with a chuckle as he settled back against his pillows, William the Bloody awful poet finally had a worthy challenger. Yep, nothing like a good rodgering to bring out the latent poet.


	3. Dawn the Bloody

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Title: William, Bloody William

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Author: RedDwarfette

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Email: SpikeyVampPunk@yahoo.com.au

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Rating: R - This is for the people who were blissfully clueless as to what was happening during 'Smashed' and chose to remain that way.

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Summary: Spike and Buffy think they're being sneaky but someone knows what they've been doing and is inspired to write them a bad poem. Set after 'Smashed'. If this sucks, at least I know there's enough Vampire in it :)

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Disclaimer: The characters within this Fan Fiction are completely the property of Joss Whedon and UPN. But I do claim the seriously bad poetry!

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William, Bloody William - RedDwarfette

Chapter 3 – Dawn The Bloody

18th/3/2002

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Spike rolled over in the bed snuggling closer to Buffy. It was early morning but they still had an hour before Dawn got up and he had to sneak down into the basement till she left for school. It was hard to believe that they had been carrying out the deception for months now without anyone having a clue. Buffys eye's opened and she smiled at him pulling his head down for some tonsil hockey. Pulling back and stretching, Spike noticed a piece of paper sitting on the dresser. Rising he picked it up, returned to the edge of the bed and began to read.

Ode to Being Quiet - __

B if for Buffy who thinks I don't know,

E is for the eagerness with which she puts on the show,

I is for the Ire I feel being torn,

N is for the Naughty Vampire who sneaks out at morn,

G is for Gross, I mean for real!

Q is for Quiet I wish for, when you guys catch a feel,

U is for the Unusual situation that we are trapped in,

I is for the Images of you two in sin,

E is for the Endless bad poetry I find,

T is for the Trauma you've left behind.

So, Big Sis and Best Friend, when you are takin' a whirl,

Take pity on Dawn, muffle the noises, before I hurl! 

Spike laughed with tears streaming out of his eyes. Buffy grabbed the note, she glanced at the door as she read hoping Dawn hadn't heard last night's performance. They looked at each other sheepishly before falling back on the bed giggling. It was obvious that William the Bloodys painful legacy would continue.


End file.
